Dogs the Gaem



(Dogs the gaem logo made by Dreamy Star, Find more of their work here:

Dogs the Gaem is a fun parody of a TTRPG where you play as dogs on normal, every day experiences. You know, going outside to pee, sniffing other dog’s butts, burying the bones of the pet store owner you and your crew took out the day before. You know, normal things.

Dogs the Gaem is a fully functional parody game system, with some elements that need to be determined by your Story Leader. The core of the game system involves flipping a coin each time you attempt an action that would normally rely on a roll of dice in other game systems. The coin doesn’t determine whether or not you fail or succeed, as you always succeed in Dogs the Gaem, it merely decides which end of your dog body ends up performing the action.

Want to bite the mailman, but get tails? You awkwardly walk your butt at his leg instead. Want to pee on a tree, but roll heads? So what if you accidentally puked to mark your territory. Same effect, different method of action.

Number values from your very clearly unique-from-one-another skills, berk, bork, and Bark, work together with your boof bonuses (earned from barking together as a group of dogs) to grant you a bonus of some sort of number. But dogs don’t understand what numbers are, so that’s not up to you, the player, to understand. The SL parses what these numbers do for your action, and how well you succeed as a result.

One thing you do know, though, is how to use the two ends of your body. You can gain great abilities for each end from a laundry list of abilities that allow you unique talents, like really great aim when peeing, a bite that doesn’t let go, or a fart that makes everyone leave the area.

You don’t level up, but you do get Good Dog Pets, which you can use to raise your scores or buy new abilities and powers. Your Hit Pets are likewise mostly irrelevant, as any damage you get can be healed by the loving pets of any human you can find.

Embrace the dorkiest parts of yourself, and give this game a try when the playtest PDF goes live in the next few months.